How Harry and ‘thirsty’ Meghan ‘squandered’ their chance in Hollywood and alienated everyone: ‘Good riddance’

Meghan Markle and Prince Harry arrived in town six years ago with big plans to make it in showbiz. Now they’re starring in “Megxit II: Montecito’s Revenge!” — and are headed back to the UK with their options exhausted, sources say.

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Hollywood had welcomed the Duke and Duchess of Sussex with open arms — and wallets — after they stepped down from the royal family in 2020. Cut to this month, after the duo’s latest producing attempt, a summer Girl Scout documentary called “Cookie Queens,” crumbled at the box-office like a stale Samoa.

Word that the runaway royals are skedaddling back to England elicited emotions from industry insiders yesterday.

One knowledgeable source shared that several former employees of the duo’s Archewell production outfit remain in touch via text and bond over being unofficial members of the “Sussex Survivors’ Club.”

A showbiz insider familiar with the pair added of their departure: “Good riddance to them… they have squandered all chances of making money here. [Plus] Harry needs to find a footing in the UK before his brother [Prince William] comes to the throne.”

We previously reported that the couple’s documentary, “Cookie Queens,” went stale at the box office after the couple had appeared at Sundance earlier this year to promote the film. The doc has made $564,847 in two weeks of release. And while no one expected the cutesy project to be a blockbuster, it opened behind a compilation of internet cat videos, “CatVideoFest 2026,” which is now at $800,000.

But a source close to the pair pointed out regarding the doc: “The Rotten Tomatoes score is [91%], and it’s numbers should be reviewed in the context of the documentary marketplace,” adding it was, “a good start to the film as part of a broader awareness campaign and audience-building for streaming [and] awards… It’s the kind of feel-good content the world needs.”

Away from their latest project, a movie biz source told us that the couple couldn’t drop their tedious royal pretensions in town.

“There was a thirst for them to sort of find a way to maintain their royal lifestyle… in terms of how people interacted with them, and respected them and, you know, how they moved throughout the world. And then I think it all fell apart because they never figured out who they were or who they wanted to be. Like the goalposts kept moving.”

The insider added: “She was the more thirsty of the two of them, honestly. Though I think they both wanted to prove a point to the royal family that they could be as meaningful as they believed themselves to be in the UK.” As for Prince Harry, “He’s not a producer. He doesn’t care about producing things. Like he’s always been about being of service and doing charity and giving back. He’s never had a business idea.”

They’d allegedly worn out their welcome with famous friends and industry insiders — after initially palling around with Montecito residents like Oprah Winfrey and Tyler Perry. A source told us: “I don’t know that they’re still friends with Tyler Perry. I don’t think they really talk to Oprah anymore.“ Perry had reportedly lent the Sussexes his mansion, private jet and security team when they arrived in the area six years ago.

They leave town with a Netflix deal that’s limping along after the couple originally negotiated a $100 million pact in 2020, and Markle’s high-profile series, “With Love, Meghan” (which was used to promote her As Ever goods) not picked up after two seasons. Netflix has also backed out of Markle’s As Ever brand.

They also came to town and signed a $25 million deal with Spotify, but then “mutually agreed to part ways” in 2023 after just one season of Markle’s podcast “Archetypes.”

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Page Six reported last year that Markle was also dropped by WME, according to multiple sources, after months of speculation about her relationship with the top Hollywood agency. An industry insider said at the time that Markle, 45, was “too demanding” and “difficult to work with.”

The agency denied giving Markle the royal flush back then, and said at the time it was still working with her by stating: “WME continues to represent Meghan and Archewell.”

But we’d heard that the onetime “Suits” star had not held any meetings with top WME powerbroker Ari Emanuel since early 2024. (Though she was believed to have met with her day-to-day agents.)  “Ari was done with her,” said an insider. Markle had an outburst in January 2024, Page Six reported, when the duchess demanded a meeting “and expected decks and plans.”

A different source told us yesterday upon hearing the news Markle was heading back to the UK that in 2024, Emanuel “personally sent an email to Harry and Meghan, [saying], you’re nitpicking this team that we put together for you. I’ve looked over the work, and everything they’ve done for you. I’m content and happy with it. We’re not the right fit.”

Said a source of the agency: “They stopped working together. Nobody was working on Meghan’s stuff.”

But a source also said that Markle remained close with her other agents at WME. (Sources had previously told us that the agency brought in Markle in 2023 due to her relationship with another client, Serena Williams.) The agency still technically reps the couple’s Archewell Prods.

Meghan’s original team was Brad Slater and Jill Smoller. She is currently handled by Carolyn Moneta and Ikenna Ezeh, (the latter reps Jonathan Majors and Lupita Nyong’o), but mostly for acting opportunities.)

Then again, Meghan has a movie coming up! But she plays herself, we hear. The film, “Close Personal Friends,” starring Brie Larson, Jack Quaid and Lily Collins, follows, “Two couples — one famous, one not — who meet in Santa Barbara and become fast friends.”

Pals close to the couple told us of the UK move: “They are spending more time there this fall after a lovely visit this summer. They want their kids to experience more of it and to spend more time with extended family and friends.” Righty-ho!

They’re also likely listing their Montecito mansion, The Post reported.

Page Six also reported that Harry and Meghan are moving back to the UK to be closer to King Charles — and to ensure their children build relationships with the royal family. But that the “frost” between Prince William and Harry endures, and the heir to the throne refuses to talk to his younger bro.

The Duke and Duchess of Sussex made their plans to leave California earlier this month, weeks after their July reunion with the ailing King Charles.

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